I must say that 2008 ended with dreams waiting and wanting to come true. And I welcome 2009 in the same light. I sealed 2008 with wishes for myself and my family, my work and my advocacy. While I am not comfortable disclosing these wishes in cyberspace, suffice it to say that these were wishes & hopes for better days ahead for all of us.
I visited home in Tacurong on the first day of 2009. The house used to be a seat of laughter and fun when I was a child. An aging aunt and mother now calls it home. I missed my Papang and little brother Francis as I smelled and savored the old stuff that remain so familiar and close to my heart. I saw (albeit only in imagination) my father tending his backyard garden and relished the thought of being able to talk to him again, about Christmas, about things I wish for. I saw Francis merry-making with his self-made tambol humming his self-composed tune in a world only he knows and understands. My brother loved this Season so much! Then it came to me I was just imagining people and things. And I begin to feel a huge sense of loss.
Christmas to me now has become more of remembering or going back to the past -- to the child's world I used to know. It also has become a reminder of Christmases past, and the many years I saw Christmas unveil its different faces. It is too profound to dig deeper into the abyss of my emotions that come with this Season. What I am most sure of is that there is something so spiritual about Christmas that hardly surfaces against this very flimsy and material world.
I thank 2008 for the days I saw my family finding simple joys -- Papee immersed exposing his thougths on cyberspace via his blog, my son Ivan Anakin in his make-believe war while I am just whiling time away either reading or watching The Buzz and Showbiz Central.
I thank 2008 for the occasional visits of my mother, my brother Dino and his family, for occasions that allow me to see my other brother Geoffrey and his kids, for visits to my in-laws.
I thank 2008 for the many times we've conquered stressful situations -- of family members getting sick or problematic, of complicated people in the workplace, of frustrations that come with not getting what we wish or hope for.
In many ways, I am grateful for everything about 2008. I welcome 2009 just as grateful as I was in 2008. I hope this year will be kind.
Happy New Year!
I visited home in Tacurong on the first day of 2009. The house used to be a seat of laughter and fun when I was a child. An aging aunt and mother now calls it home. I missed my Papang and little brother Francis as I smelled and savored the old stuff that remain so familiar and close to my heart. I saw (albeit only in imagination) my father tending his backyard garden and relished the thought of being able to talk to him again, about Christmas, about things I wish for. I saw Francis merry-making with his self-made tambol humming his self-composed tune in a world only he knows and understands. My brother loved this Season so much! Then it came to me I was just imagining people and things. And I begin to feel a huge sense of loss.
Christmas to me now has become more of remembering or going back to the past -- to the child's world I used to know. It also has become a reminder of Christmases past, and the many years I saw Christmas unveil its different faces. It is too profound to dig deeper into the abyss of my emotions that come with this Season. What I am most sure of is that there is something so spiritual about Christmas that hardly surfaces against this very flimsy and material world.
I thank 2008 for the days I saw my family finding simple joys -- Papee immersed exposing his thougths on cyberspace via his blog, my son Ivan Anakin in his make-believe war while I am just whiling time away either reading or watching The Buzz and Showbiz Central.
I thank 2008 for the occasional visits of my mother, my brother Dino and his family, for occasions that allow me to see my other brother Geoffrey and his kids, for visits to my in-laws.
I thank 2008 for the many times we've conquered stressful situations -- of family members getting sick or problematic, of complicated people in the workplace, of frustrations that come with not getting what we wish or hope for.
In many ways, I am grateful for everything about 2008. I welcome 2009 just as grateful as I was in 2008. I hope this year will be kind.
Happy New Year!
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